Having a cute waiter like I’ll have the chicken with a side of that dick
SOMEONE THOUGHT ABOUT YOU A LOT TODAY PROBABLY
finishing a bottle of shampoo and conditioner at the same time is the biggest achievement of my life
it’s kinda messed up that winnie the pooh and jack the ripper both have the same middle name
*does 360 on heelies* wanna date me?
romeo thought juliet deleted her blog so he deleted his and she was so sad she deleted for real